ROCK thru invisible disability at work
Part 1: Empower yourself
by Lee Havenga | January 19, 2023
More than 600,000 people in the US have an ‘invisible disability,’ symptoms not visible from the outside yet significantly challenge a person’s everyday life. I’m humbled that I had the opportunity to share my story with over 600 people at my company of how these four principles guided me to get support instead of suffering in silence.
RESPECT
You are not your illness. Respect yourself by knowing your value unconditionally.
Apply it
Courage for a journey with an invisible disability starts with knowing your unconditional value. It took me a while to get to this place after I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. But please hear me when I tell you even if you have an invisible disability, you don’t need to feel invisible. You have so much to offer your friends, family, and co-workers. The more you recognize your value, the more your attitude will begin to shift. You will start to show up instead of shrinking down. Your contributions may look just a little different after your diagnosis. Repeat after me, “I am valuable unconditionally.” If you need practice, try this free self-respect meditation until this rings true in your heart.
OWNERSHIP
Ditch the denial. Take an honest inventory of your situation so you can take action to get what you need to be healthy and productive.
Apply it
Do you look happy on the outside but are crushed on the inside? The fear of being perceived as ‘less than’ had me in denial, ignoring MS and not getting the treatment and support I needed. I was headed in a downward spiral both emotionally and physically until I took Ownership.
Take a big deep breath and start an honest assessment. Divide a piece of paper into three columns labeled: Fears, Available Support, and Disease Progression. Take a few days to create a comprehensive perspective, but no longer, so you don’t become overwhelmed. You may even want to research the available support and disease progression. You will likely learn new information if you are coming out of denial. Once you’re complete, review and make an action plan. Ask yourself, “How can I get over my fears and leverage available support to slow, stop or cope with the disease progression.”
CONNECTION
Even superheroes have sidekicks.
Make Connections to get support and resources.
Apply it
Although vulnerability is scary, push through this fear to get what you need. First, make Connections to those in your inner circle. Share your specific struggles and how they can support you. Then, extend your reach to others with expertise that can help you navigate. This may include resources from a society associated with your disease or human resources representatives at your workplace. And if finding the right resource is overwhelming, make a Connection with that friend who keeps reminding you to “Let me know if there is anything I can do for you.”
KINDNESS
Give yourself Kindness every day so you can thrive, despite your challenges.
Apply it
Sometimes, we need a little Kindness to get through the day. So, when your disability is making you feel invisible, give yourself Kindness. A few suggestions:
Get flowers.
Cozy up with a cup of tea.
Enjoy a hug.
Go to sleep early.
Close your eyes and take a long, slow, deep breath.
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