Respect Through Emotional Boundaries

he first step in applying this prayer is learning how to set emotional boundaries. Respecting others, no matter how challenging they may be, begins with accepting that we cannot change them. Whether it’s a family member who frustrates you or a co-worker who doesn’t meet your expectations, understanding that each person has their own life, decisions, and behaviors is critical.

Emotional boundaries come into play here. By recognizing that their behavior is beyond our control, we prevent ourselves from internalizing their actions. Respecting others means letting go of the desire to control, fix, or judge them. It’s not about liking everyone’s actions—it’s about understanding that every person has inherent worth, even if we disagree with them.

Setting Emotional Boundaries

But how do we stay respectful when someone’s behavior is affecting us? That’s where emotional boundaries come in. In her book ​Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself​​,​ ​Dr. Nedra Glover Tawwab​ discusses how emotional boundaries help us draw the line between what’s ours to control and what belongs to others.

Healthy emotional boundaries prevent us from taking responsibility for other people’s emotions and choices, allowing us to protect our energy and emotional well-being. Instead of trying to fix others, setting emotional boundaries allows us to accept their behavior while deciding how much it will impact us. The ​Council for Relationships​ describes it perfectly: Emotional boundaries limit who can access our emotional space and how much others can influence us, use our time, and affect our feelings. Setting these boundaries gives us clarity and confidence in our relationships.

Apply it:

Here’s a step-by-step way to set emotional boundaries and practice Respect:

1. Identify the trigger: Notice when someone’s behavior causes you frustration or stress. Ask yourself, “Why is this bothering me?”
2. Determine control: Decide if this is something you have control over. Can you change    this person’s behavior? If not, focus on your response instead.
3. Set a boundary: For example, if a colleague is constantly negative, you might say, “I’d      like to keep this conversation focused on solutions instead of problems.”
4. Enforce it consistently: Stick to your boundary. If the person continues with the            negative behavior, you can choose to step away from the conversation.
5. Let go of the outcome: After setting your boundary, release the need to control how    the other person reacts. Remember, you can only control yourself.